


daydreams

by kunnskat



Series: OCs Through the Fandoms [15]
Category: Dreaming of Sunshine - Silver Queen, Naruto
Genre: Gen, Genderfluid Character, Original Character(s), Read for Free on AO3, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:34:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23591653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kunnskat/pseuds/kunnskat
Summary: Sasuke doesn't know when he's going too far, Naruto doesn't know when he should stop and Sakura doesn't know how much is too much. They'd be a great team, she thinks, if this was the canon world.She knows it isn't when she meets Nara Shikako.[SI as Sasuke-centric in Dreaming of Sunshine Universe.]
Series: OCs Through the Fandoms [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/730176
Comments: 21
Kudos: 253
Collections: Heliocentrism — a Dreaming of Sunshine recursive collection





	daydreams

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Dreaming of Sunshine](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/53648) by Silver Queen. 



> The pronouns WILL be confusing, that is on purpose. Just keep in mind that Sasuke uses they when they feel good and safe and at Home and then uses she as a more "I'm in public" pronoun. This is because Sasuke feels more like a they/them but is willing to think she/her because they think it'd be more accepted if they get outed somehow. They have little to no knowledge of gender, so y'all won't see any gender discourse. Just Sasuke thinking a little about they/she pronouns and then using them at separate times.
> 
>  **Things I do when I have exams:** write fanfiction  
>  **Things I don't do when I have exams:** proofread my exams before handing them in

They start running before they can walk and gains bruises from it that ache more than they should. They meet their first Medic Nin because of this when there's a hint of a break in their left foot. They knows this because they can feel it, even if they don't understand most of what they all say. 

Sasuke does know they’re being scolded, however, afterwards. The stern expression on their mother's face offers them the clue the words won't. Immersion isn’t the perfect or best way to teach a language to someone easily confused but Sasuke finds themself slowly managing anyway, picking up as much as they can as best as they can. It is easier than reading and writing. At least speech has an easily understood tone. 

Itachi carries them around more than he has time for until they’re well past the stage of 'better'. They think he might be going through D-ranks as fast as he can in order to return to them. That might be a problem, but it also might be a solution. It does change up his missions. 

"Strive to do your best, but be mindful of your limits," their father tells them like he doesn't look at them expectantly every second of their new life. They are to be the next Itachi, and part of them believes they will be. The other part screams at them to smack him for thinking he can control them.

Sasuke is no puppet, not this version.

During dinner, a few days later, they declare that they want to be a Medic Nin and help people like they’ve been helped.

There is no future for them in that, but the struggle it creates in the clan gives them more training than they should be allowed as everyone try to sway them into being something more battle oriented. They’re not afraid of pulling the Tsunade card, but they keep that in hand for a more public moment, if not one with any or all of the Uchiha Elders.

Wandering off while Itachi has a mission proves harder than it should be with their very large clan, but they manage. Probably with a hidden escort that they can't see, but they can live with that for now. Eventually, they’ll prove their responsibility even within the village and they'll stop watching them so much.

Or maybe they'll watch them more closely when they realize they’re always looking at pretty 'girly' things. Well, they’re not going to pretend they don't enjoy prettiness, no matter how judgmental the clan turns out to be.

It takes three tries of flower-picking, most of which results in flowers given to their parents as sneakily as they could, before they spot Ino running through the flowers. It also takes just as long to think that maybe they should try being she for a while. It’s not the they that they were used to once, but it’s also not the he they still aren’t used to. It’s the she they’d known once before they realized.

Ino looks pretty in purple, Sasuke can already tell she knows her colors, and they want to be a part of that. They - she - feels a little jealous, knowing they can’t go home and ask for skirts and dresses. 

Well, maybe she can if she also asks for she instead of they. They’ve yet to even hear of anyone being a them, here, not even in canon though they don’t know all of it. But he as she, that’s possible even if it’s made a joke of. 

It’s like returning to their childhood home. All the memories and toys are there to remind them of who they used to be, even if it no longer fits quite right. It is an easy mask to don in comparison to revealing their real self. 

"Hello," she greets quietly, carefully because she doesn't know if all the girls are too young to be fangirls yet or if her day is about to go bad.

"Hi!" Ino returns, bright and shiny and so, so cute. "I'm Ino, who're you?"

"Sasuke. Are you here for the flowers?"

"Uh huh, I'm learning about them! Why're you here?" it's rude but Sasuke invited that into her life when she'd greeted Ino. She knows this can go wrong around a thousand different ways.

"My mother always smiles when I bring her some. What are you learning?"

Ino seems delighted to get to tell her all about it, Sasuke doesn't have the heart to tell her she doesn't understand half of it. She manages to extract a promise to show her some of the flowers the next time they see each other before escaping, relieved to see that the fangirl phase has yet to begin.

If she's lucky, it never will.

Meeting Naruto is a stroke of luck she does not expect, but she still talks to him just like she'd talked to Ino and firmly ignores all rudeness because she figures no one wanted to teach him any better. Except he's not quite as rude as she expects.

Naruto is hesitant, wary and careful to trust, but he doesn't run for the hills and she makes him smile twice, a stubbornness clinging to each of those smiles.

"I'm gonna be Hokage!" he exclaims to her, obviously determined to press it, but she nods at him and derails what promises to be a rant.

"You'd better work hard, then. Have you started learning to write, yet?"

"No," he deflates, like a balloon. In speed. Why does she even use that saying, it's ridiculous and no one here would get it. Probably. She's not sure if there are balloons in this world. There might be, though, because a lot of not so important things were forgotten from early on when she decided to prioritize a possible clan survival. 

"You should. We can work on it together, I started not long ago," it's not like she's offering the time of her many own tutors in it, just herself. She'll get to spend more time with Naruto and don't they say that to master, you must teach? That is a saying she can get behind.

She leaves behind a hopeful child when she sees how late it's getting and remembers that she'd promised to be home to greet Itachi after his mission. It grows darker with every step she takes away from Naruto.

Sasuke wakes up choking down a scream in the morning, the sun with a hole in his chest visible every time they close their eyes after. They take to carrying some of their work with them from then, ready to hunt down Naruto whenever they can in order to stuff lessons down his jacket if that is what it’ll take to never get to that point. 

It bores him, just as they’d known it would, but Naruto still smiles every time he sees them. 

When the Academy starts, Sasuke knows Naruto will at least be able to read for homework even if his writing isn’t the greatest. That’ll mean so much less to explain if they still end up on the same team. Given that Sasuke survives. 

Sakura would always have come into their lives given time, it's probably better to not tempt fate by letting her and Naruto hang out and allow her parents to spot it. Sasuke only gets away with it because of her mother and Itachi. And possibly because her father genuinely does care even if he’d prefer to tell her to stay away for the sake of their clan.

Sasuke isn’t blind, she sees how they’re treated and maybe she should work to help better their image but at this point of time she hasn’t yet figured out if she thinks the Uchiha are better off not so easily available to Orochimaru and Danzo both. 

So she runs with what she has and if things happen in a way to give her opportunities, she takes them. She has to. 

When she meets Sakura hanging out with Ino and another barely familiar girl, she smiles at them and says, “hi Ino, who are your friends?”

“This is Sakura and Shikako,” she introduces the two, pointing them out as she goes. “Sakura, Shikako, this is Sasuke.” 

The alliteration-fan in her grins at the names and she lets that grow instead of allowing her curiosity to get the better of her at Shikako. That sounds like a Nara name and she’d thought only heirs had Shika in theirs. Or possible heirs. A cousin of Shikamaru, maybe? Civilian? Well, it’s never a bad thing to have a Nara friend, so she treats her just as kindly as the other two. 

“Nice to meet you both,” Sasuke nods. 

“Flowers again?” Ino asks, placing her hands on her hips in what Sasuke assumes is to prove her superiority or grab the spotlight. 

“Yes, I wanted to see if I could find red ones,” a shrug to prove that she doesn’t care if the news that she picks flowers spreads. Sasuke knows her gender and is not offended if they decide to call her a girl. It isn’t what she identifies as, but at least then she might be allowed to wear skirts. If the Uchiha elders don’t throw a tantrum. 

The other two looks confused, but Ino grins back and regally waves a hand to her left, “you’ll want to check that way, then. Say hi to your mom!”

“Thanks Ino, hope to see all three of you around,” Sasuke runs off, knowing that it’s better to go slow than to overwhelm shy little girls with attention. She has no intention of making them stick around that much, she just needs them to be socially attentive to her when they see her. Seeking her out could become an issue if they decide to do it the day of the possible Massacre. Ino would be safe from harm, and maybe Shikako too, but Danzo would definitely get rid of Sakura in a heartbeat. Outright disappear her, even. 

Tsunade’s future apprentice doesn’t deserve Danzo’s attention. No one does but at least most of them can evade it. 

Sasuke is not politically active or aware but she is doing her best to try learning without getting caught. If it all still goes according to canon, she won’t have the excuse that she wasn’t aware and then she might get dragged into Root or something equally as bad. Best they don’t realize she knows. 

It’s not that she wants to think badly about the villagers of Konoha, it’s just that she can’t help but think about how Naruto is treated and wonder if they’ll look at her, think Uchiha and decide they don’t like her and that if she’s going to be a problem, it’s not going to be theirs. That it’s not just Danzo’s roots that decay their branches but the villagers who are learning to be just as prejudiced. Ignorant, maybe. It’s like Naruto just doesn’t exist sometimes and Sasuke has never dealt well with being ignored like that.

If Sasuke is to improve their relations with the village, she needs to know what to improve. She needs to interact with them. 

The question is if they will decide that even a child of the Uchiha should be shunned, well more ignored but that’s a method of shunning too, or if she will get a pass purely for her baby-face and expressiveness. She’s scared to test the hypothesis, but it has to be tested. Maybe if people make her cry, they’ll feel bad and start treating them better but Sasuke doesn’t want anyone to see her cry at all.

Having to need someone feels awkward not just because her previous life had taught her that as an adult, or even just mature for her age, should mean that she can manage on her own. It’s a lonely thought, but it is theirs and they can’t help but to still feel it. 

She loiters not far from an Akimichi-run bakery, hesitating anyway. 

“Sasuke?” a slightly familiar voice comes from behind and she jumps, twirling around to stare wide-eyed at Shikako and what can only be the Nara clan head and heir. 

It’s rude to not answer, her mother have lectured her several times, so even though she’s fidgeting slightly, she offers a tentative smile and a shy, “Shikako, hi.” And though she wants to add the same for Nara-sama and Shikamaru, she hasn’t been introduced and can’t actually be sure how they should be addressed. 

“Um, this is my dad and my brother. Dad, Shikamaru, this is Sasuke. Ino introduced us?” Shikako is a lot less shy than she’d seemed, which Sasuke is honestly grateful for because otherwise they’d be standing there like idiots, probably. 

Especially Sasuke, because she’d been reasonably sure that Shikamaru was an only child. But that’s a panic attack for a later Sasuke. 

“Nice to meet you, Sasuke-kun,” Nara-sama nods at them, Shikamaru just gives a slight wave. When all Sasuke does is nod back, Shikaku looks between her and the bakery and there’s something thoughtful in his expression that Sasuke can’t read. She hopes it is a good thing but the Uchiha luck doesn’t seem to offer any hope. 

“Going for something sweet?”

“Oh, um, no?” Sasuke wasn’t, originally, anyway. Even if she is treated alright. They can be nice but she still remembers that canon Sasuke had hated sweets and yes, she could change that, but she should do better in this life and so she limits herself with better options. “I don’t like sweets that much.”

“Hironobu-san has lots of other options,” Shikako quietly points out and Sasuke can only nod, when she continues with, “you could come in with us? We can share something to see if you like it.”

Nara-sama is not obviously looking at her when they enter the bakery, but Sasuke thinks he might be anyway because she is so very hesitant to approach the counter and reveal herself. She probably won’t be kicked out in full view of the Nara clan head and heirs, but they might still be cruel enough to make her cry. Ignoring her really would do the trick more than being short with her and that just makes her feel for Naruto so much more, just thinking about it.

Something bumps into her and she blinks with wide eyes at Shikamaru who rolls his eyes and grabs her wrist, nearly dragging her over to the displays of cakes. When Hironobu gets to them, she quietly waits for the Nara to finish ordering and is waiting her turn when they look at her expectantly. 

Sasuke stares blankly back until Nara-sama sighs and says, “order with us, Sasuke-kun, I’ll cover it.”

“Oh, no, Nara-sama I couldn’t possibly-” is as far as she gets blurting out excuses when Hironobu-san smiles at her and says, “how about we put it on the house this time, and you’ll come back in the future. A loyal customer deal.”

Hironobu-san winks cheerfully at her and the part of her that had stayed tense even while Shikamaru had prodded at her to consider her options eases up now. She doesn’t kid herself into thinking it isn’t noticed, but she does smile shyly back and points at the carrot cake in the display. 

“Thank you,” is directed at all four of them, when the little box is put in her hands and she carefully holds it so as to not squish it or drop it if someone else bumps into her. It’d be easy for any other villager to ruin this for her, after all. Someone might feel tempted. 

Still, at least Sasuke knows for sure that the Nara aren’t out after the Uchiha. That makes things easier to get through. 

They let her run off after that, with only a mention to pass along a hello to her family from the Nara. She figured that would be it, because Shikamaru is lazy and Shikako is shy and Nara-sama probably figured out whatever he wanted to know by then. By all reasons, her interactions with the Nara should’ve stayed at whatever interactions she got with Ino. 

...When did Ino find the time to befriend Shikako, though? Kunoichi classes? Wasn’t there a thing in canon about not pushing together the Ino-Shika-Cho group? Maybe they already know by now that Shikamaru will be on that team, though what that means for Shikako is a question Sasuke isn’t ready to think about in terms of teams and being ninja. 

Life is quietly okay for a while. And then, at dinner five days later, their father joins them and asks Sasuke about their interactions with the Nara. When all they can offer is a confused mention of having run into them further in the village, he hums and tells them that Nara-sama had asked about them. 

Sasuke isn’t the only one staring at Fugaku now, Itachi sets down his bowl and chopsticks to frown slightly at their father, “did he say why?”

“He mentioned Sasuke being friends with his daughter,” the man explains and very obviously doesn’t say that he didn’t elaborate. 

“Shikako is nice,” Sasuke offers, tapping on a quick, “Shikamaru, too. I like them both.”

Fugaku nods once, but their mother is smiling warmly at them like Sasuke had just brought her the prettiest flowers in the village. It’s clear that she’s happy about Sasuke making friends. Itachi is much harder to read, but what little Sasuke knows says he’s pleased as well.

“It’s good to have ties to the other clans,” is the start of another dinner-long lecture on politics that only their previous knowledge says the man learned from his more clever wife. Or was that just fanon? Sasuke is inclined to consider Mikoto the one to really look out for. They’d once watched her dress down an Uchiha elder and it was Epic with a capital E. Ten out of ten would watch again. Even if it had primarily been Sasuke’s fault. 

“Can I invite them to dinner the next time I see them?” 

“Of course,” their mother says before the other two can say anything. “Any of your friends are welcome here, Sasuke.”

They feel tempted to invite Ino, Sakura and Naruto as well, but maybe that’s better served for later when Naruto being there might not be an issue on any count. They’ll decide when they see them, they think, because if everyone else ends up coming then they refuse to exclude him. It’s one thing if it’s just the Nara, it’s another if they intend to invite all their friends. 

“Thank you, mom. I’ll let you know in advance,” Sasuke promises, too aware of just how much effort cooking can take to spring it on her. It earns them another smile.

“Train me,” Sasuke demands, clinging to Shisui’s leg like the child she is supposed to be. Shisui, in turn, is looking down at her with exasperation, just returned from a mission and dirty. Sasuke is willing to put up with that, though. 

“At least let me shower first, and eat,” the much older boy reaches down to peel her off, unfortunately successful. 

“You’ll train me after?” if the pout works, it’ll be so worth it.

“Isn’t Itachi going to…?”

“Aniki is busy,” she informs him, still pouting. 

“I’m busy,” Shisui points out, probably hoping it’ll persuade her to go home or something.

“You don’t have anywhere to be for days, not after an out of the village mission. I already had that lesson at the academy,” so there, she thinks, only not sticking out her tongue because that’s better for when they’re separating and not when she’s about to spend time with him. One cannot simply annoy one’s teachers until after they’ve given the lesson. 

“Fine,” Shisui sighs tiredly, “I’ll train you tomorrow after breakfast, alright?”

“Pick me up at home,” Sasuke demands in return, nodding firmly as if the decision has been made and Shisui has already agreed to do just that.

“Go home, Sasuke, isn’t it almost dinner-time?”

“You should come with me, I’ll wait until you’ve showered,” crossing her arms, Sasuke kicks off her sandals and walks inside to sit down, proving herself fully willing to wait however long she needs to. 

Shisui sighs and gives in, wandering off to take that shower and change his clothes. Bored, Sasuke figures this is a good time to practice meditation. It’s difficult to stop thinking about random things so she doesn’t get anywhere by the time she’s picked up from the couch she’s claimed and Shisui sets her down by her sandals, eyebrows raised. 

“Finally,” she tells him, “I had to wait forever, you’re slow.”

Shisui twitches in clear outrage and Sasuke grins back at him.

If this plan works, it will be so worth it, so Sasuke is going to milk every possibility to make it happen. At least she’ll know she tried.

“Let’s just go,” giving in, Shisui leads the way back, Sasuke at his heels.

“I’m home,” she calls when they get there. “And I brought Shisui!”

“Welcome home,” her mother calls back, even though it’s not the done thing to speak loudly inside. Sometimes Mikoto just doesn’t seem to give a shit about how she’s supposed to act as a housewife and Sasuke is so here for it. 

“You are amazing,” they tell her, dragging Shisui into the kitchen with them. “Can we help?”

“Vegetables, Shisui-kun. Get out the rice, Sasuke-chan.” 

Tomorrow they’ll drag Shisui to see Hironobu-san and try to spread some good PR for the Uchiha, but today they’re going to enjoy dinner together with their family.

She waits until Shisui has taught her a new chakra trick, one she struggles to get the hang of because chakra still feels weird to have, to demand food. It’s all planned, so when he says they can go home now, she instead turns her very practiced puppy eyes and asks that they go see Hironobu-san instead because, “I promised I’d come back, Shisui, I can’t not go.”

“You just want free snacks,” he grumbles back at her, and she grins wide and hugs him because she knows it’ll persuade him. 

“Fine, pack away the kunai and show me where to go,” that’s probably just to distract her from his worry so she pretends not to notice it. Taking his hand after, she pulls him along without having to put too much effort into it. He’s too nice to make her. 

“You’ll like it,” she promises. “I got carrot cake last time and it wasn’t too sweet at all! They’ve got really good baked stuff there, Nara-sama seemed like a regular.”

“Nara-sama?” Shisui echoes, eyebrows raised.

“I met him and his heirs when I first went,” is the easy explanation, and the only one he’s getting. Telling him about what she’s been doing would mean explaining why and how she knows. And then Itachi will get involved and they’re all in so much trouble already that she doesn’t want to make things even harder on him if everything follows the path of canon anyway. 

“Shikako and Shikamaru are pretty nice,” continuing her little monologue to at least try to distract Shisui is a nice goal, and at the same time she can let him know that the Nara don’t hate them. 

“Pretty nice?” he’s wiggling his eyebrows when she looks at him, so she rolls hers and pretends she saw and heard nothing. 

“Here we are,” Sasuke announces, gesturing grandly at the place even as Shisui lifts her up, poking her side. It makes her giggle, then pout at him while he grins back, “you think they’re pretty, should I warn Itachi?”

“No, I want to invite them over for dinner soon,” she can only imagine what her brother would do with that kind of information. “Be good before then.”

“Fine,” Shisui sighs as if relenting to some horrendous task. “But only until they’ve been for dinner!”

It takes effort to introduce Shisui to Hironobu-san through her giggles, but she manages. 

Shikako treats her kindly, at the Academy, even when some of the other girls change. Even when Ino and Sakura waver on the edge between understanding that she’s just a kid like them and falling into the rising wave of fangirls. Had they always started this early, deciding that Sasuke would be a great catch from the get go?

She doesn’t know, never really thought about it, but she’d assumed it was because of his skills. Hers aren’t as great, not even with her edge over on what he’d had. Knowledge is its own power but that doesn’t mean it’s also not a heavy weight that’s tipping her over little by little. 

It takes Sasuke three weeks to evade people enough to catch up to the Nara before they get to their compound.

Shikaku pauses, practically carrying the kids, to wait for her to catch her breath and let them know why she’d been running after them but it takes a red-faced Sasuke a minute longer to blurt out, “-can I invite Shikako and Shikamaru to dinner next week?”

Obviously, she should have asked the two directly but the words are already out there so. 

Shikaku looks amused, from what Sasuke can tell, but he shrugs like it doesn’t matter to him and it goes quiet before she realizes the two are probably waiting to be invited now. The red face isn’t just being tired from running, anymore.

“Would.. you like to come to dinner? Uh, on whichever day works for you?”

It goes quiet again, Sasuke doesn’t bother to pretend she’s not nervous about their answer, and then Shikamaru sighs out a, “Troublesome,” and “we’ll come home with you on Wednesday,” and Sasuke brightens enough to smile genuinely at all three.

“I’ll let mother know when I get home,” she agrees and then runs off before they can ask where her cousin is. He picks her up more often than not, but Shisui didn’t show up today which works just fine for her in this instance. She’ll drop in unannounced tonight to check if he’s on a mission or not, but since he’s been on some lately she doesn’t think he’s currently under Danzo or too busy to do Root work. 

Things aren’t as bad as they’d been in canon when That happened so there’s probably, hopefully, still time. 

“Is Shisui home?” they ask Itachi at dinner after pouting at him when he denied them training. 

“He should be,” but he could’ve gotten a mission since last Itachi saw him so it’s no guarantee. Still, there’s a high chance he’s home and Itachi sighs when he looks at them, “I’ll bring you there before I leave,” he promises quietly.

Sasuke turns wide, pleading eyes to their mother next, but Uchiha Mikoto is not easily swayed and merely says, “come straight back home if he isn’t there, Sasuke-chan.”

No waiting there, then. At least not until dark, like they want to. 

“Alright,” they agree anyway, because it’s better than not getting to go at all.

Swinging her upon his back, her brother hops onto rooftops and runs their way there. Sasuke giggles the entire way not just because it feels amazing and like they’re flying, but because she wants Itachi to go with good memories in his thoughts. If he’s going to be away for a while, she wants him to remember her smiling so he won’t worry and be distracted.

“Thanks,” she tells him, and doesn’t say the words I love you like she wants to. She doesn’t remember any of them ever saying the words.

Itachi leaves her at the street Shisui lives before shunshining away, trusting her to keep her word about going home if Shisui isn’t here. Sorry, Itachi, she thinks as she locks herself in and avoids the traps at the entrance like Shisui taught her to. He’s not home as much as she should be or even pretends to be, but she won’t tell. Maybe she’ll be his alibi tonight, maybe she’ll get in trouble because he doesn’t need to hide where he was, but she loves him enough to try. 

Sasuke quietly makes her way into his bedroom instead, crawling over to the wall side and waits. He’ll sense her whichever room she’s in, but in this one she might see something he’d prefer to hide like a Root ANBU mask. She’s been trying to catch him for a while, but no luck so far.

Waiting is so boring when she can’t distract herself and let him sneak up on her - one of the many reasons she’s failed before - and she can’t stay too late either way or mother might send father to pick her up. That feels like a bad idea all around.

Shisui doesn’t show for hours, not until Sasuke is trying to think up a good enough excuse for when she gets home, but today might be her lucky day because upon arriving, she gets a glimpse of a white mask before it quickly disappears. She has to blink a few times to try to retain the image but Shisui picks her up with a frown and she loses it.

“...Welcome home,” she tells him with the widest innocent eyes she can manage.

**Author's Note:**

> See Dreaming of Sunshine by Silver Queen to understand better the universe this is set in! Hironobu originates from wafflelate (Frolic), he seemed like the best way to push Sasuke at the Nara while trying to complete their goals.


End file.
